where does the pee come out of this thing
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
