There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Randomize
