I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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