areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Ladies don't puke and tell
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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