I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
where are my eyebrows?
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
