I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
