Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
