whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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