I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
