I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Do vagina's smell?
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
