why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
