singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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