if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I just cut my nipple shaving
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
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