AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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