Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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