Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
