do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize