yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
