can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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