told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Is it because I queefed?
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
