Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
