plz talk dirty to me
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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