absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
