I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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