did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Randomize
