Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
