I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Randomize
