its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Congratulations! We have a period
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
