yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Randomize
