11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
