So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Randomize
