Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I came so hard my ears popped.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
