Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
honey bunches of taint.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
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