My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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