im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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