Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
