No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
50% drunk capacity currently
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
