Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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