Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
