We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
