when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
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