it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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