He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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