Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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