you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I got her a Nickelback box set.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
