just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize