The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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