Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
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