You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Randomize
