these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
