i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
