it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize